The List…

Every woman is familiar with “the list.” That list that she makes which entails all of the attributes she is looking for in a person that would have potential to become her beloved husband.  That list seems ethereal, but at the same time it is real and varies in length and content depending on the woman (if she has a list at all). Many men have a list too.

I had a list. Well I have had several lists and then I threw them away.  A very different list returned in 2011 when I was in prayer regarding my heart and what God was expecting of me, not only as a godly woman, but as a godly wife.  The genesis of the current list began in 2009 after breaking off my engagement.  I asked for God not to just send me someone I wanted, but someone that I needed in order to do what he wanted me to do. In 2011, I prayed that God would lay on my heart the attributes that I needed to pray about for my husband (yet to come). There were eight specific things that were put on my heart and I wrote them down. That was the list. There was nothing physical, just character and personality traits.

Now, most people believe that we create these lists in order to ask God to gift us these wonderful things in another person. What I am learning is that the list is more for me than for the Lord. God already knows who I am, who I will be, and what I will do for the rest of my life. He also knows who I will need as a partner to co-labor in this journey. God already knows. The one who doesn’t know all of these things is me.

I am the one who needs that list in order to know when that person has come along.

I am the one who will need to reference all that I have learned and all that I have been shown in order to walk in faith believing that the moment has come.

This was a very interesting phenomena that just came to me recently because I was pondering about what God does with all of our random requests in this life. Since he is all-knowing, why would he need to wait on us incapable creatures to give him a rudimentary list of demands? He doesn’t. God doesn’t work like that. He just waits for us to come into the realization of what he wants to do, and he will use various things – even the foolish – to remove the scales from our eyes.  Even a list. A list that we may think we created, but was really formed on our behalf and placed in our hearts.

So I wait…

Watching the pieces fall where they lay…

Looking for correlations…

Somehow…I sense that puzzle is complete, but is in a room where I cannot go right now. So, I have been occupied with putting together a different puzzle that requires a lot of my attention…


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